Dexturd - Season 6 *Spoilers*

[Merk]

This is all from memory and almost certainly completely wrong, on the plus side though Revelations is the only real interesting book in the bible so I've actually read it. Keep in mind that the language that is used in the book is extremely allegorical, numerological, and symbolical (which of course creates a couple of problems for scriptural-literalists) so I'll try to use a dumbed-down interpretation of the book:

- Some dude named John gets confronted by some angel whose job it is to show him the end of the world.
- John gets sent to some weird place (probably heaven, it's not exactly clear) where God sits on a throne and oversees these angels undoing the seals on these scrolls that will undo the world and bring Gods chosen people to him.
- The book then goes into detail and what each scroll does, the first being the infamous Four Horsemen.
- One of the seals makes a point to destroy the city of Babylon which was seen as the center of human debauchery.
- Another seal marks the chosen people that will be saved when the world ends.
- A bunch of horrible other shit happens in each seal. One of them does mention an angel pouring destruction onto the world from a bowl-like apparatus.
- After the whole seals thing my memory gets a little hazy. I know there's some shit about a whore giving birth into the awaiting mouth of a dragon (not making this up) which I think symbolizes the futility of the human condition and their subjugation by Satan.
- After that I think John gets shown the numerous people that are in heaven and how great and awesome the place is.
- John gets sent back and is told to write about what he saw and he ends it with a prayer. The Bible ends. Yay!

Obviously Wikipedia gives a better summation and bullet points the chapters:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Book_of_Revelation

I just skimmed through it and yeah there are a lot of important details I left out. Basically the point of the book is to put the fear of the end times into people and accept God as their savior from themselves just like every other book in the Bible.

As far as order on Dexter goes, there isn't one. There are a couple of vague references in the show to the book but beyond that we don't know what Hanks' plan is to end the world and method he'll use to do it. Hopefully they'll go into his motivations some more and it'll be more interesting than "He's crazy." If Olmos was a true professor of Theology then he definitely would not be taking Revelations literally but hey, it makes for good TV.

[Merk]

If you really want to know the order of things then look here:

http://www.olivet-discourse-revelation. ... ation.html

Good luck. As a heeb I hope you are happy that both the Abrahamic and Dividic covenants get fulfilled. You are one of the chosen who have the mark.

[Merk]

Chet Hanks. The lesser Hanks.

[Potter]

Chet Hanks. The lesser Hanks.

flol

[Potter]

well, that episode was good for a few things

quinn is still hilarious

dexter fucking HATES videogames

he fucking CRUSHED that kids soul - wonder what the kids intentions are? Maybe he really is only making a videogame. perhaps he only had the ITK's hand for research for the game, considering he mentioned you can pick different serial killers, I'm sure ITK was one of them. but man dexter slammed his shit lawl

dat next episode should be good

[Fluffyumpkins]

Does anyone have Showtime? I'd like to see the final episode of Dexter live. We could have a viewing party.

[Merk]

That would be cool as fuck but I doubt any of us here have on IndyDDR would have it since it's pretty expensive if I recall and half of us don't even have cable. We'd have to confide in some rich douchebag friend who none of us really like but he holds cool parties and has nice things so we keep him around. Unfortunately I don't think any of us has one of those types in our friend arsenal. Plus said imaginary friend probably doesn't appreciate the subtle nuances of Ghost Dads and Hack the Gibson serial killer aficionados.

Haven't caught the latest episode yet but if episode 11's preview says anything it's that Dexter and Deb are gonna fuck, Quinn or Batista are going to die, and the show is going to jump the shark.

[Merk]

Caught the episode last night but I have work and shit so I'll give my thoughts on it here in a bit.

[Fluffyumpkins]

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[Potter]

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[Merk]

Image from episode 12. Please don't click if you don't want to be spoiled:

http://imgur.com/6ZLTM (lololol my car is in the background, Camry power gogogo)

Work was busy this week, sorry boyos. I enjoyed last week's episode even though Hanks pulled a huge 180 in personality. It's hard to believe Hanks' sister had only nice things to say about him to Deb and she didn't even appear to have a hint of nervousness around him despite the fact that Hanks has been psychotic his entire life. I sometimes wish I was a retard so I could not see the Olmos twist coming and could fully appreciate Hanks' new characterization but it is what it is and I guess the show's target audience had the wool pulled over their eyes.

Hack the Gibson intern is definitely suspicious of Dexter and is playing him IMO. If you notice this episode gave that "Elliot Search Engine" a lot of screen time so I'm guessing the intern is using that to track Dex's searches.

If the last two episodes end up having a shload of tension and excitement then it'll make up for this season's lackluster middle third. I still hold hope. Please don't let me down.

I have no idea why Dexter called 911 at the end of the episode, hopefully we'll see!

Predictions (quasi-spoilers if you haven't seen the previews to next week's episode):

+ Quinn saves Batista from the Doomsday couple's apartment after they set it on fire. Quinn gets "redeemed" and Batista forgives him for being a drunk, lazy but lovable partner.

+ Doomsday couple lady tries to set off that bomb at Miami metro but gets shoved into an interrogation room before exploding and no one gets hurt, potential plotline dies.

+ There will be an awkward scene where Deb subtly comes on to Dexter. Dexter acts awkwardly, Deb catches herself being goofy, potential plotline dies (good).

+ Episode ends on a cliffhanger where Hanks figures out where Dexter lives and breaks in to find the babysitter taking care of Harrison while Dexter is out dealing with Hack the Gibson intern for some reason.

+ Hot Intern will not come back and I will be upset.

[Fluffyumpkins]

Season 7 starts with Harrison being kidnapped.

I meant Season 6 ends.

[Fluffyumpkins]

Please post, Merk! What did you think? What are your predictions? Will it be as simple as pushing someone into a room?

Do Deb and Dex get jiggy?

[Merk]

K, I've had my coffee so now I'm ready to actually do shit at work today.


(So fucking awkward, this had to be absolute hell for Jennifer Carpenter and Michael C. Hall considering their background, I'm positive this was all done in one take. This is probably the most obvious stage kiss I've ever seen too. Suck your ex-wife's fucking chin you beautiful man)



I'm really glad this show has a definitive ending now that they are stopping at Season 8. I feel like the writers had to keep shit going and give Dexter infamous plot-armor since Showtime wanted them to keep churning out episodes indefinitely. Although Michael C. Hall in a recent interview said that they don't know exactly how the show is going to end, the fact that they are thinking about it and can deliberately start writing a final story arc gives hope that seasons 5 and 6 will retrospectively be viewed as "the shitty seasons" while everything else is gold.

This season thus far is the antithesis of Season 5. I've been re-watching that season over the past couple of days and for the most part the season actually wasn't as bad as most people like to say it is. I try to put myself in a time when these episodes were fresh and the season's end was still a mystery. The Quinn and Robocop plotline brought some tension to the show (albeit in a goofy non-Doakes sort of way), the Irish nanny felt like she had something up her sleeve, the overarching revenge plotline had a Kill Bill feel to it, and we all had faith that all of these things were leading up to something significant since this show had not let us down before. The problem of course was the ending, the giant reset button, the loose ends, the stupid Santa Muerte Miami Metro plotline that literally led nowhere, the blueballing improbabe "Oh my God Deb is going to find out" fake-out, and Lumen going back to her home planet. All of these left us cynical and with a bad taste in our mouths; the edginess of Dexter's actions having consequences has faded and the writers are more than willing, anxious even, to turn this show into a parody of itself. The meticulous serial killer can slop his way through his murders and the very police department he works for will inevitably turn a blind eye through some sort of Deus-ex-machina.

Which brings me to Season 6 and the upcoming season finale. We have 45 minutes left and a fuckton of things that need to be wrapped up or addressed:

+ What's going to happen to Matthews?
+ Is LaGuerta going to get her comeuppance?
+ Is the toxic gas exposure going to have long-term effects on Dexter?
+ What the hell is the point of Chicago Cop who has been absent for pretty much the second half of the season?
+ How will they resolve Hanks?
+ Is Miami Metro going to find the giant devil picture of Dexter when the random elderly couple Hanks killed is reported?
+ Is Deb's more-than-an-adopted-brother interest in Dexter going to go anywhere? (I hope not, god damn, it's a hilarious one-off as is and I hope it's never brought up again)
+ Are Quinn and Batista going to break up?
+ What the fuck is going to happen to jailbait babysitter?
+ And most importantly, what the fuck is the deal with Hack The Gibson intern? I'm honestly more interested in his character now instead of Hanks.

Given the uncertainty the writers had on whether or not this show was going to be renewed, I have a sinking feeling that we're going to have another giant reset button. But there's hope! There's hope that a sub-par season can be reversed by an exciting and satisfying ending. I'm not going to pass judgment until it is all said and done. But I will say that if the ending is another cop-out, then this season will be the ultimate example of "great idea, atrocious execution." The premise of a "religious nutjob who kills in the name of a higher power" villain isn't exactly original, but it's something this show could have done well. As I mentioned before the whole Olmos payoff took way too long and I think the season really suffered because of it. What exactly does Olmos being a ghost dad mean to the bottom line? It establishes that Hanks is crazy. No shit. And now, "he's crazy" is the character's backstory. All the other villains (sans The Skinner) were fleshed out and interacted with Dexter in some sort of interesting way. Something interesting happened to each villain that made them the way they are and added some maligned justification to their actions. Why is Hanks crazy? Why did his sister never mention, respond, or in any sort of way acknowledge Hanks' craziness? Why did Hanks attached himself to religion? Why did he focus on Gellar? These are things that should be addressed midway through the season but now that we face the end there is nothing more to do other than view his ultimate fate. But there's still hope.

Here's what I think might happen:

+ Hack the Gibson intern is going to have a huge significance. He obviously knows Dexter's secret or at the very least has a strong suspicion that he has a secret life. One of three things I think will happen -- 1) He saves Dexter from Hanks but is arrested for killing Hanks by LaGuerta. 2) He is set-up as the next season's "Dexter super-fan that wants to copycat his favorite serial killer" villain. 3) Nothing happens in this episode, but next season he is the one who breaks Dexter's secret after being rejected by him so many times.

+ Hanks is arrested by Miami Metro and Dexter's secret is put in danger in a cliff-hangerish ending. Deb gets lauded for catching a major serial killer and proves that she can be a lieutenant.

+ Batista's sister is killed, he leaves the force or transfers elsewhere, Chicago Cop and Quinn become best buds.

+ Deb blows the whistle on LaGuerta. Matthews and LaGuerta are ousted for being corrupt.

+ Hanks is killed by Dexter who is then caught in the act by Hack the Gibson intern. Roll credits.

+ Deb finally finds out and is incredibly conflicted now that she's an incestuous beast. Deb/Dex become a fucked up brother/sister killing team that fucks each other and this show reaches a new level of crazy.

+ This whole Deb/Dexter thing has to be leading to something. I'm pretty sure she's either going to find out or she's going to die.

+ Harrison is not going to die. If jailbait babysitter is offed then he is going to be sent away somewhere or he goes to Catholic boarding school.

+ Nothing significant happens. Hack the Gibson is never mentioned again, jailbait babysitter is never mentioned again, Hanks kills himself / gets killed and made to look like a suicide, all the little sideplots don't get addressed, LaGuerta keeps her job, Matthews is never mentioned again, Quinn is redeemed, Dexter gives some voiceover about faith, giant reset button.

[Merk]

I will say though that the Deb wetdream was pretty funny and well done. Kindhearted and caring Dexter was so out-of-character that it was neat to see how he would act if he wasn't always brooding, furrowing his brow, or putting on an awkward front. Michael C. Hall is a great actor.

I thought Dexter's totally fucking deadpan look when Deb was all like, "OMG you saved everyone!" was the hilariously unattached classic Dexter that we all know and love.