Bad movies and the discussion of it.

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Fagulous
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Bad movies and the discussion of it.

Post by Fagulous » Tue Jun 07, 2005 1:23 am

It's been awhile since I've seen a magnet thread so here goes,

basically just bitch and complain about any movie you've seen that you didn't like for whatever reason.

I'll start:

Young Adam, so many people told me it was good, and that I would get to see Ewan McGregor's penis. Well the acting was good and I did get to see his penis, but it was flaccid and it was only shown for a few seconds.

The story was just a mess, and it had no dissernable point, or conclusion.

The story goes like this.

Ewan is a barge man in the 50s and drags a dead body from the river on the shore, for some reason this makes him increbibly horny and he eventually sleeps with the head bargeman's wife. His wife is saggy breasted and pretty plain looking.

most of the movie is spent showing people randomly talking about the dead bitch, ewan fucking the fish wife, and other random people. Through a series of sporadic flashbacks we find out the dead bitch from the river is ewan's girlfriend whos death he is partly responible for, making his makeout session with the fish wife even more creepy.

anyway, some else get gets accused and sentenced to death, and other than sneaking a note that says I did it into the courthouse, he does nothing to stop it, the end.

The only redeming quality is that, you get to see ewan throw custard and other various condiments onto his girlfriend and basically rape her while you have trouble trying to tell whether or not she is laughing or crying.


It's my least favorite kind of deep movie, the kind that just trys to convey emotion, not any sort of message or point. blarg, I love bitching about other people's work, that is probably much better than anything I will ever do, it makes me feel better as a person.

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Post by SoDeepPolaris » Tue Jun 07, 2005 8:34 am

Laurel Canyon
-shitty acting, shitty plot, shitty sex scenes
Horrible
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Post by MSGAddict » Tue Jun 07, 2005 11:23 am

The Clearing
Too long, too boring, sucky ending.
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Post by sam » Tue Jun 07, 2005 12:08 pm

hey fagulous you can see a really really big fake penis in boogie nights
insert code compile execute return

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Post by Soma » Tue Jun 07, 2005 2:36 pm

If only all it took was a night spent making a paper mache dong to enter the porn industry...
The same blue sky in a strange new world...

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Revenge of the Sith

Post by built-to-spill » Tue Jun 07, 2005 4:09 pm

The worst Star Wars movie ever made in my opinion. I was very excited to see it at midnight and was completely let down when I did. Haden whats-his-name is one of the worst actors I've ever seen and his role was extremely important and his inability to act along with a few other things ruined the movie for me. I actually laughed out loud when he's told that Padme is dead. NOOOOOOOOO!!!! I hope I never have to see that movie again. Attack of the Clones is by far the best out of the new 3, I want my $6.50 back.
Steve Fletcher

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Post by TylerHHS » Tue Jun 07, 2005 5:01 pm

I thought that The Ring 2 was awful.

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Post by Silent_Blade » Tue Jun 07, 2005 5:34 pm

The Longest Yard, was probably the worst movie I've seen resently...It's like the moment it started up I could feel my last few remaining braincells slowly dying =(
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Post by Crotis Jivefunk » Tue Jun 07, 2005 9:22 pm

sharktale is one of the worst cgi movies. i don't hate it because it's a fish movie (that's part of it though) but it has a shitty plot. some fresh prince like character (character designs are some of the fugliest and laziest too. jesus, it looks like they pasted the actors' faces on cartoon fish) wants to be popular, well known. it's cliched. then his boss has connections to the mafia, which felt very out of place. the jokes are all lame pop culture jokes like mussel crow, jessica shrimpson, shrimp king, etc. all felt like they were ripped out of shrek 2. the town even looked like new york city. jack black's ambiguously gay shark aside, the characters were dull stock characters. the ending was sappy too, will smith's character is made manager, two hiphop fish sing carwash, i vomit. i did like the rasta jelly fish though.

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Post by MSGAddict » Tue Jun 07, 2005 9:48 pm

Crotis Jivefunk wrote:sharktale is one of the worst cgi movies. i don't hate it because it's a fish movie (that's part of it though) but it has a shitty plot. some fresh prince like character (character designs are some of the fugliest and laziest too. jesus, it looks like they pasted the actors' faces on cartoon fish) wants to be popular, well known. it's cliched. then his boss has connections to the mafia, which felt very out of place. the jokes are all lame pop culture jokes like mussel crow, jessica shrimpson, shrimp king, etc. all felt like they were ripped out of shrek 2. the town even looked like new york city. jack black's ambiguously gay shark aside, the characters were dull stock characters. the ending was sappy too, will smith's character is made manager, two hiphop fish sing carwash, i vomit. i did like the rasta jelly fish though.
I completely agree..
...that movie sucked
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Post by Fagulous » Wed Jun 08, 2005 1:21 am

sam wrote:hey fagulous you can see a really really big fake penis in boogie nights
Yah I've seen it, ewan's is real though, besides I'm an avid renter of gay porn, so seeing huge cock wasn't the only deciding factor in renting it.

oh yah, also me and my friend for the life of us could not figure why the movie was called Young Adam, as none of the characters were named Adam.

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Re: Revenge of the Sith

Post by Fagulous » Wed Jun 08, 2005 1:23 am

built-to-spill wrote:The worst Star Wars movie ever made in my opinion. I was very excited to see it at midnight and was completely let down when I did. Haden whats-his-name is one of the worst actors I've ever seen and his role was extremely important and his inability to act along with a few other things ruined the movie for me. I actually laughed out loud when he's told that Padme is dead. NOOOOOOOOO!!!! I hope I never have to see that movie again. Attack of the Clones is by far the best out of the new 3, I want my $6.50 back.
:P I was told I should have my dick chopped off, when I equated it to Power Rangers.

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Re: Revenge of the Sith

Post by LikeableRodent » Wed Jun 08, 2005 6:33 pm

built-to-spill wrote:Haden whats-his-name is one of the worst actors I've ever seen and his role was extremely important and his inability to act along with a few other things ruined the movie for me. I actually laughed out loud when he's told that Padme is dead. NOOOOOOOOO!!!! I hope I never have to see that movie again. Attack of the Clones is by far the best out of the new 3, I want my $6.50 back.

That NOOOO was James Earl Jones, not Hayden Christensen.

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Post by DjKARL » Sun Jun 12, 2005 2:32 am

Three words:

Oh

No!

Zombies!

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Post by x5060 » Sun Jun 12, 2005 8:44 am

Joy Ride.... worst movie ever.
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